Beauty in the Struggle

“Beauty in the Struggle”, I feel, accurately and artfully depicts the journey that is my life to this point.  Reading and analyzing the work of such amazing men and women during the course of my undergraduate studies inspired me-- those who have endured hardships and continued to fight for what they believed in and loved. These individuals changed the lives of so many through self-determination and drive to be great, to fight for what was important to them...and humanity as a whole. Before she passed, my great-grandmother would always tell me, “Brian baby, look at the bright side. I call it my silver lining” (I heard ‘lion’.)  From that day forward my favorite animal has always been a lion. I try to remind myself in any situation that there is something to be grateful for, there's always a silver lining. 

Growing up in Chocolate City was certainly an experience. I appreciate every second of my childhood and if I had the option to do it any other way, I would NOT! As young black males, we were faced with crucial decisions for survival most days and there was certainly no shortage of opportunity to get involved in less than favorable activities. Other days were spent doing what was considered more “fun” an escape if you will, playing the sport that really changed my life and that I love dearly: Football. Practicing on a dirt field, it wasn’t uncommon to find a needle or two, we even spotted a dead body once then finished practice after the coroner left. Through various tests associated with growing up with 50+ brothers all fighting to escape our version of hell, we earned each other’s loyalty.  We had to trust each other. Traveling home from one of the city’s worst neighborhoods, fighting rival schools who were often jealous of our success on the football field or even kids in the neighborhood foolishly thinking we were a quick come up. Being at the end of a barrel, losing friends and loved ones. Things like that make you acquire a sense of fearlessness and that is a dangerous acquisition when combined with opportunity. (Two Mice Link). 

My family is my base. We’re lovers of music, dancing, and food. Family gatherings are a place to showcase success and laugh about the things that have occurred since we last saw everyone. Oh, and spades games are taken very seriously! Our deep roots go back to the South as sharecroppers in Wilson, North Carolina. Though I have looked into a traditional African name, we are The Whites. My grandfather had eight siblings, and a clan of cousins I don’t know yet. My grandmother’s (Nana) side is from “Chocolate City”, Washington, D.C. Her great aunt owned a chain of hotels in the Northeast area. Murphy, her great-grandfather was a white, Irish barber. Coincidentally, my father now owns a barbershop. We’ve been through it all and we continue to fight. We have seen the best of times and certainly the worst of times, yet something tells me we are nearing a level of success never experienced before in our family. 

Going off to college has been the best experience and teacher in my life thus far. From Washington, D.C.,  I have traveled the world via the University of San Diego. Through that journey, I’ve made life-long friends, brothers, mentors and found myself and my purpose on this planet. I call it “Growth in the Wild” because aside from the two years I attended St. John's College High School on an academic and football scholarship, I had never gone to school with white kids. Of course, I had many friends of all backgrounds but on a regular basis, my time was not spent around white people. My alma mater, Friendship Collegiate Academy, had a graduating class in which  98% of the students were African American. Needless to say,  I adjusted well to being on my own in California. Though very different, it was certainly a safer environment. The school was interesting and I became exposed to things that many of my brothers that I grew up with may never be afforded the opportunity to experience. I took that responsibility to share and teach very personally. Seeing the kind of wealth on campus that I aspired to have was motivation for me to spend nights in the library studying Mandarin, reading articles, researching business models and case studies, or writing papers. 

My sophomore year. 

III.XV.XV 

Before traveling the world, I had to go home and bury my mother.  She loved to be on the ocean so I spread her ashes as we sailed. Thank you, Dean John, and the entire Semester at Sea Family. Thank you Arch Bishop Desmond Tutu for your life, leadership, and words of encouragement. It is truly a blessing to have met you. That was my transition point, my Coatlicue state. I made the commitment to take everything I experienced/learned in life thus far and share it, to never give up and lead those who would come after me.  

The theological basis for this collection, the thesis is this. In life, challenges arise, but the marathon is the race, not the 40-yard dash. Day by day is how greatness is achieved. Through any struggle can come beauty. And so my message to the world is to BE GREAT. 

To embody the philosophy of “Be Great” I must always be willing to be myself and unapologetically so. To be in the position to influence for the benefit of our community and inspire those who would come after to eagerly pursue that same mission. Resources at my own employment whether they be mental, physical, financial or otherwise are nothing beyond the blessing from our creator as a means or tool to accomplish the task he has placed me and all of us here for. I humble myself daily to be aligned in that.

But also I am forgiving of myself if should I fall short; I know that I am only human. Knowing this about myself allows me to be forgiving of others when they fall short. There is a time that I continue to reference when reflecting on my own growth around diligently and responsibly using my own resources. That would be the repossession of my first vehicle. My time was mismanaged and the result of that was not just a repossession but also a break in regular commitment to spend time with a few young men I had been mentoring at the time. I learned that when I assume the responsibility and privilege to serve I must be willing to sacrifice the time or energy it takes to always be present for those looking up to me for guidance. I'm better, greater, and grateful for having learned and shared the willingness to sacrifice for the greater good with others. Be great!